Between my birthday, and my leaving for Kansas City, I worked on writing Alisha a letter. Well, honestly, it was pretty much done about a week after my birthday, but I didn't have the courage to send it to her until the day before I left home at the end of September.
For two months, I read and re-read the letter I was going to send to my birth-mother, expressing my desire to finally take the next step in our relationship. What would she think? How would it take place? When would it happen? Did I really want to? Was I really ready for this?
But I sent it, September 28th. In the letter I had expressed how happy I was to have received her journal and how all my life, being adopted was a huge part of who I was, and I loved sharing my history with people. But most importantly, I told her that I didn't just want to meet her, but I wanted to be apart of her and her family's life. I then gave her my Kansas City address just in case she wanted to write me back while I was there.
About a month into my internship, I received two letters on October 21st. One was from my parents, celebrating my, what we fondly call my "gotcha day", or in other words, the day that I was officially adopted. The other was from Alisha; it was her response to my proposal of taking the next step in our relationship.
She began the letter informally, asking how Kansas City was and talking about how school was going for her (she was getting her masters in public health). She then went on to say how having a daughter was also something that was a big part of her life and she would love to start thinking about the next step. "Let's keep writing and see where that takes us."
How should I respond to that? I had always envisioned my first meeting with her in Texas, where she lived. But I didn't feel like I couldn't just invite myself. That is rude in any situation, and this time, I felt that it was even less of an option. Her coming to Omaha? I guess that would be ok, but with my parents there...it just didn't feel right.
I decided all I could do was wait. I didn't respond and continued to hope that someday everything would work out the way it should.
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